Do you feel that you’re ready to settle down? Are you hoping to meet someone who are honest, kind and loyal? Are you expecting to share your interests and values with your equal partner? Or do you just want great sex? What are you looking for in a relationship?
When I was younger, I used to think that these questions would be easy to answer. I’d just say someone who treats me like their own, and that would be that. But as I grew older and began dating, I realized it wasn’t that simple.
It doesn’t matter if it’s online dating over dating app and dating site or hiring a relationship coach to help you find an ideal partner for casual dating, and pure physical affection, or even a serious relationship with a solid foundation.
Reading this article can really help you determine what you are looking for in a potential partner and relationship.
What Are the Important Things to Look for in a Relationship?
When you expect certain good qualities from your potential partner, you must first ensure that you possess such great relationship qualities so that you can easily attract your desired successful relationship into your life.
You might think that the main thing to look for in a relationship is someone to love, cherish and lead a happier life with. But this is only one of many ways to find the right person for you, and there might be other important ones in healthy relationships. You also need to consider how well you can get along with that person, if there is any physical attraction, sexual compatibility or if they have a good sense of humor.
Moreover, your answers to ‘what are you looking for in a relationship’ also change along with your increased love experiences and age, physical attraction and sensual happiness may be the most important things in a relationship at your 20s, shared values and life goals may become more important at your 30s.
Here are some of the most important things you should think about:
Honesty
If your partner is not honest and transparent with you, it will be very difficult for you wanting to move on with this relationship, and honesty is the deal breaker in your relationship with someone.
Shared interests and core values
You should have similar interests and core values, as well as see eye-to-eye on some of the important things in life that are an integral part of your relationship.
Mutual Respect and support—
You should have mutual respect for each other’s differences, encourage each other’s growth, mutual support of each other through hard times, and even nurture the best friend qualities in your partner.
A shared outlook and relationship goal
You don’t have to be the same person in every way; you just have to share enough fundamental values that you enjoy being with each other and can handle different situations together.
Good communication
Communicate effectively means you can solve challenges and conflict together. Dr. Gary Chapman wrote a book ‘The 5 Love Languages‘ illustrates everyone speaks a love language (or 2) with the 5 beings: saying nice love things, doing nice things, spending quality time, physical touching and gift giving.
Willing to compromise
You and your partner should also be able to compromise with each other and be emotionally supportive, accept and compromise around the things or habits of the other one’s that seems incompatible with yours if you genuinely love each other, you will love them anyway.
You’ll probably have some things in common with your potential life partner, but there’s no substitute for getting to know each other first. Don’t rush into anything just because you think it will make life easier; a stable long term relationship is better than an exciting one. And even if your relationship doesn’t last, you may still feel good about it and be living life to the fullest afterward.
There are many things to look for in a relationship if you want to live a happy and fulfilled life. If you are not in a relationship, “how to find love” will give you honest answers and advices for a long term relationship besides knowing “what are you looking for in a relationship”.
What Are the Biggest Red Flags in a Relationship?
Don’t waste your time with someone who doesn’t respect you and their own life. You want someone who can be trusted. You’ll be spending time with them. You’ll share your thoughts and feelings with them. And if they can’t be trusted, then there are no guarantees.
But what if you’ve been dating for a while, and you still don’t feel that you’re a good fit? What if you feel that almost every day your partner isn’t really into anything that you are? Is there a way to know if this relationship is going anywhere? What is your biggest red flag on your partner?
While most relationships start out with passion and promise, every couple faces challenges and issues as life goes on.
Here are some of the biggest red flags that indicate a potential problem:
- He or she doesn’t listen to you. If he or she is not willing to listen to you when you want something important to say, then it may be great time to move on to look for someone who does respect and is open minded to your ideas, opinions and core values.
- He or she avoids talking about their ex-lovers and previous relationships.
- He or she is narcissistic and toxic partner.
- He or she doesn’t want to share their money.
- He or she lies about where they’ve been and what they’ve done.
- He or she has a lot of friends who are less than cool.
- He or she doesn’t help with housework or childcare.
- He or she doesn’t respect your personal space.
- He or she refuses to acknowledge the problem and sees nothing wrong in the relationship.
- He or she is unable to communicate effectively.
Just be aware of these red flags and some other red flags, be also aware these 14 non-negotiables in your relationship. Whether you’re looking for a fling or a lifelong and serious relationship, be smart about it, and don’t wind up in an unhealthy or unhappy situation with the wrong person.
Don’t be too quick to judge someone simply because they exhibit some of the traits on this list. Don’t despair! There are ways to have an honest conversation with them and get them to start taking responsibility for their behavior.
The thing is, even good and healthy relationships need work. It doesn’t mean your relationship is broken; it just means you need to put effort into fixing it and get out of your comfort zone.
Bottom Line
What you are looking for in a healthy relationship is going to have a major impact on what kind of person you go on a date with, and that’s why it’s so important not to be vague. In a serious relationship, we must value the other person and the hearts of both. The ideal relationship doesn’t just happen by chance. It takes patience and commitment. You don’t need sunshine or rainbows to make you happy. You just need someone who will listen and care, who will accept you just the way you are, and who will share your dreams and common interests.
So what are you looking for in a romantic relationship? If you are looking for someone to have a deep, fulfilling, and committed relationship with, go for it! Sometimes there is a fling or spontaneous physical attraction, but true love and healthy relationship are where the focus should be. When you’re older, less distracted by youthful expectations, and more knocked down by real life (than when you’re younger), you will perhaps see the value of emotional maturity more clearly.
What are you looking for in a relationship? What makes you feel the most comfortable? Let me know in the comments below.