This is a hilarious and puzzling question that comes to mind when you worry about your partner’s sexual activities. Perhaps you just began building intimacy with someone new, or are having a nagging thought about your partner’s dedication to your long term relationship.
This article will share with you the 7 signs a man has not made love for a long time.
What are the 7 Signs?
Generally, you can group these signs into both physical and behavioral signs. But for clarity, we will talk about them in seven detailed hints on what to look out for to assess when last your partner had sexual intercourse.
However, it’s important to note that the accuracy of these signs may depend on how long your relationship has been. The longer your relationship with your partner, the better it gets at deciphering their behaviors.
Sudden shyness and lack of confidence
One of the 7 signs a man has not made love for a long time is shyness and lack of confidence. This can be quite revealing, especially if he used to be confident.
Now he’s suddenly become self-conscious or uncomfortable with his appearance. It can be a sign of low self-esteem and insecurity caused by a lack of physical intimacy.
Increased irritability or stress
Another strong indicator of the lack of sexual intercourse in a while is irritability. This could be his way of expressing sexual frustration. It’s not easy to cope with a lack of physical or emotional intimacy.
So, it is completely normal for the lack of having sex to manifest in mood swings or increased stress. As the lack of sexual activity continues, he may also become withdrawn from social activities, preferring solitude over company.
It may also seem as though the both of you deal with more relationship problems than normal. These signs aren’t definitive but can indicate a man hasn’t spent quality time with his partner in a long time.
Hero Instinct
Some men might display a “hero instinct” or be overly affectionate which may indicate a lack of recent sexual intercourse. The “hero instinct” is a concept about a man’s inherent desire to protect and to feel needed.
If you notice that a man suddenly becomes overly protective or starts to exhibit excessive affection, it might be a clue to his lack of recent intimate sexual intimacy, because this unexpected rise in his “hero instinct” could be his way of compensating for his unfulfilled sexual desire.
However, it’s essential to remember that this behavior, though a possible sign or lack of sex, doesn’t always directly equate to a lack of sexual activity.
Crave validation and emotional intimacy
An increased need for emotional connection is yet another of the 7 signs. We often have a preconceived notion that men are always wanting sex. And that they don’t spend time building intimacy through emotional connection or validation.
However, this is far from the truth. Men, just like women, also crave emotional intimacy and validation. So, when they want a long term relationship, they are also interested in building with that partner. And at the same time, they want to feel desired, appreciated, and connected on an emotional level. This need doesn’t vanish, even if they’ve not made love in a while.
If a man hasn’t been sexually active for a considerable period, his emotional needs might become more pronounced.
Pornography consumption
Some men consider other habits to compensate for the lack of spending time with their partner. In this case, they retreat more and more into consuming erotic and pornographic content as a way to let out some suppressed sexual energy. You may find them spending too much money on erotic games, videos, and other accessories.
And yet this negatively impacts their relationships. This is because it can create a vicious cycle, as excessive pornography consumption leads to addiction, dependence, and emotional disconnect, further driving the desire for pornography.
Preoccupation with sexual desire
A man who hasn’t had any form of sexual activity in a long time may also become increasingly absent-minded due to preoccupation with thoughts of sexual desire. He may also become so preoccupied that his actions seem to center around it. For instance, he might seem to get more breathless whenever he sees skin.
You may also see that he craves physical touch, looking for opportunities to put his hands on you. These are all the different ways his preoccupation with the lack of sexual intimacy can manifest in your relationship.
Changing sleep patterns
Another sign you might find is his sleep patterns. The lack of sexual activity can affect sleeping habits, leading to insomnia. Some men may also seem to have more nightmares or vivid dreams whenever they try to sleep. They might also have a lot of restless sleep manifesting in tossing and turning, or even waking up frequently throughout the night.
Other Psychological Effects of the Lack of Sexual Intimacy
Beyond the 7 signs mentioned above, there are other ways that this lack of sexual activity might affect him. First, he might deal with more physical and mental health issues. We must realize that although wanting sex seems like a physical scene, it’s also connected to his emotional well-being. Here are some ways the lack of sexual intercourse and emotional intimacy that comes with it can affect him:
- Loneliness and isolation: Prolonged sexual inactivity can cause feelings of loneliness and disconnection.
- Depression and anxiety: A lack of intimacy can contribute to mental health issues like depression and anxiety.
- Relationship dynamics: Tension or conflict in a relationship can negatively impact a man’s sex drive.
What to do When Your Partner Exhibits These Signs?
Always remember that these signs aren’t foolproof and people are different. But they can give you a general idea and help you determine the next steps to take. Now let’s talk about what you can do if your partner exhibits any of these signs:
- Open communication: It is crucial to openly discuss physical needs in a relationship. Gently ask your partner and approach the issue with empathy and understanding. It’s possible the signs you are seeing are because of some physically draining conditions he’s dealing with.
- Spend quality time: Building intimacy isn’t just about sex. You need to prioritize spending time with your partner. Think of activities you both love and be deliberate about enjoying them together.
- Talk about your fears: if you worry your partner has other women, it’s best to talk to them about it instead of simply looking for the signs.
- Resolve conflicts: What are the underlying issues that may be impeding your relationship? It’s vital to resolve conflicts and work on your relationship dynamics. These can further strengthen your relationship.
- Seek professional help: Couples struggling with sexual dysfunction can benefit from working with a professional. They can guide how to improve quality time, and physical affection with one another. If you are interested in this route, consider qualified psychologists or therapists specializing in sexual health and relationship issues.
Knowing these 7 signs a man has not made love for a long time is super important. But then never see these signs as absolute proof. Instead, let them enrich your understanding of your relationship with your partner. Also read our post about the 13 signs a woman has not made love for a long time.
